I attended a kid’s birthday party in Delhi last week at Pizza Hut. We went inside, rung the bell and had our chairs to sit. The grandparents of six years old girl was sitting in front of me. When the waiter brought some fresh garlic bread for us, the grandparents looked at me said : beta hum logo ne toh ye sab kabhi khaya nahi.. tum khao ( dear, we had never eaten all these. You please go ahead).
I kept wondering at the dilemma of our society. Even the aunties were wearing a gown.One could clearly feel that, they are not comfortable with their dresses and were trying to fit in. The party moved on. Most of the kids were playing with their mother’s mobile phone and others were running here & there. Few girls were busy clicking selfies at the corner , others were sharing a laugh with each other with an attention focused at their phone screen.
The ambience was very colorful, people were laughing, taking pictures and sharing jokes with each other. Between all these, two old ladies sitting infront of me were discussing their old golden days.
I was listening to them, quietly. They discussed ,how they used to decorate their house, invite family, friends & neighbors for birthday parties. How they used to play antakshari or cards or other games that are alien to us these days. How they never used to bother about their dresses or makeup or jewellery and used to enjoy being them. Listening to their conversation made me nostalgic too. I went back to old days, when mummy used to have homemade cakes for me. When she used to decorate the hall with balloons & ribbons and when samosa, choola batoora & gulabjamun (Indian snacks & sweet ) used to be the fixed menu for a birthday party.
My thought broke, when a lady with most fine makeup & hairstyle walked besides me. She had the most perfect makeup , I had even seen. I slowly walked to her & said : Didi , Can I talk with you for some time. We sat around a table and while enjoying our Pizza, we started our serious conversation about makeup & beauty in general 🙂
I said, this is bit awkward to ask, but your makeup skills are amazing . Please tell me where have you learned make up from ? You look so fine !! I am bit weak in this field and want to learn the same. After few minutes, she got bit comfortable & shared something that put me on deep thought about our society trend in general.
She said, Pratibha.. you know I have huge dark circles in my face. You wouldn’t notice it now, as I have my make-up on and you have seen me for the first time.
Earlier, when I used to go to parties without makeup, people used to comment on my dark circles. It used to be very embarrassing. Gradually, I started avoiding social gathering and even if I have to attend one, I used to sit at the very corner alone . I was hesitant of taking pictures .You know the culture these days, people take selfies, photographs & post them on facebook. Then the whole series of comments & discussions starts. People used to comment about my dark circle & face, it used to hurt.
One day a lady suggested me to learn makeup from this expert, the one who taught me. I told her, “It is my dream to look beautiful & fine in parties”.Then I paid her Rs. 15000 & did months of practice. I have mastered the art of makeup now.Today, I am very comfortable attending parties, especially at nights. You know Pratibha, your makeup don’t shine too much during night because of lights. I am happy, atleast now I can attend parties, take lots of pictures & post them on Facebook.
I could senses a lot of insecurity inside her at that moment. As if she seeks acceptance from people around for her beauty, her face & all of her. I would not say, she is the only one. Even, I get insecure about my makeup, about my dress, about clicking photographs at parties at times.
That conversation made me think deep, where we have come ? What’s wrong with us ? Is it really a girl’s or anyone’s dream should be to just look beautiful ? What is beauty and relating to the old post, how would we define it ?
I feel, we have lost our way somehow following the trend. “We all have our insecurities , we all want to be accepted , we all have our little things that bother us, yet we fail to accept others fully and ourselves at times ? What holds us back ? I don’t have the answer as of now.
This discussion can go on …Even I have no answers.. Just a request.
I believe it is the time to look beyond beauty. It is the time to accept ourselves & others for what they are. We don’t have to wear a gown at 40 , if we are not comfortable wearing one. We don’t have to throw a party at Pizza Hut just to show our status symbol if our elders are not comfortable with it. We don’t have to put layers & layers of makeup to attend a party or click a photograph. We don’t have to live for our photos & comments on Facebook. We just don’t have to..
Let’s Accept Ourselves & Others Today.
Life is beautiful , so we all are 🙂